Sunday, May 17, 2015

A Letter to Lia on My First Mother's Day

Dear Little Lia,

Last week was Mother's Day. It was my first time, thanks to you who arrived just a little over a month before this day for mommies. Because I'm a newbie, spending the day felt different. I felt special from the moment I woke up, my heart oozing with pride and joy because I finally am a mother to someone. What's more, I am a mother to you, our cute fluffy ball of sunshine.

You know that we prayed for you, right? And just like what we wished for during our quiet times with God, you came into this world normal, healthy, and "happy-cute" (between your dad and I, this means bright and cute and always smiling). Right now, you can't smile a real smile yet except for those reflex beams you unconsciously make, but we know it will come very soon and I'm waiting for it every single day. smile emotic

Your dad and I love you sooooo much, darling. But in between draining days and restless nights, sometimes I wish that you grow up fast. In the middle of late night feedings, burping sessions, and diaper changes, I remember my past life with a regular 8-hour shuteye and unlimited time in the shower, and I apologize that sometimes I want it back. These thoughts are only fleeting, and I always immediately regret thinking them two seconds later. When I look at you, either sleeping peacefully on my chest, or alertly staring at my face with those eyes full of wonder, I say without a doubt, that my life is good and I wouldn't have it any other way. I may be sleep-deprived now, but I'd rather be a sleep-deprived zombie mommy any day than a well rested married woman without a #LiaLoopsy. Time flies, and you will never be this small again. I wouldn't want to miss anything, my love.

Lia, my little munchkin, I am writing this post to thank you. Thank you that you made me a mommy. Thank you for bringing happiness into our home. Thank you for bringing completeness into our lives. Thank you, thank you. It's pure joy seeing you grow every single day. From a tiny blimp in my tummy to a now plump, chubby-cheeked, and double-chinned little doll. Keep growing baby, but I'm telling you now not to do it so fast. Mommy would like each moment to linger.

Loving someone more than you love yourself --- it had always been a cliche to me, a 'concept' I would always hear about. But now it's no longer just that, because I finally understand every word.  That is how I feel for you, my little one.  Mommy loves you beyond words, forever.  

Your mommy,

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