Sunday, April 10, 2016

Marriage First

Several days ago, my husband asked me if we could go out on Saturday (yesterday) to watch a movie.  I gave an automatic reply, a YES, but after I thought about it, I asked him if he really wanted to. I wasn't sure I wanted to go because in my head, I thought about our baby. Watching a movie would mean taking a few hours of our day away from her, and I didn't want that if I could help it. The week that just passed was a very busy one at work, and I felt I didn't give our daughter enough quality time so I wanted to make up for it.  When I asked my husband for the third time and I explained why I wasn't eager to go, his reply was, "I need quality time with you, too. You and me, just this once."

That was my wake-up call.

I remembered what I told him on our wedding day. "I vow to always put you first in my life and to give you the best of me every time."  When I wrote this, the concrete example I had in my head was, even after we have kids, he will remain to be first.  Now fast forward to three and a half years later, I'd somehow forgotten about that promise.  

I am extremely blessed to have the BEST life partner who has remained consistent from day one. Rolly is a great dad, but not even once has he forgotten his role as a husband to me. When he comes home, he gives me a kiss first before he gives his attention to Lia, and this is without fail.  Even with his dearly loved daughter around, I have never ever felt like I'm just a piece of furniture in the room. His wife --- that's me --- is the total opposite.  When I come home and he's already there, I go straight to hug our baby, forgetting to even greet him most times.  He just reminds me of his presence by pointing to his lips for me to smooch (sorry ang mushy, we're like this on a daily basis, hehe). 

It's true.  While being a mom to Lia, I admit I sometimes forget that I'm a wife, too. :(

I read this just now on hellomamas.com, and I will always put this is my head:

"Your husband is the one that will be with you long after the kids grow up and leave the house. He is the one you will turn to when you can’t quite take another minute of your teenage daughter's mood swings. He will be there to laugh with you when the house seems to be caving in and there is nothing to do but find humor in it all."

"Yes we are tired. Yes we are worn thin at the end of the day. Yes we seem to have no time to ourselves. But if you have someone who is willing to fall asleep next to you every night knowing that in the morning you may look like the Walking Dead, love him with all you have!"

"A kiss, a hug, a wink or smile. A love note, a back rub or holding hands during an outing. These all go such a long way. They don’t take any time or effort and the reward is worth it. If we showed as much love to our husbands as we did to our new babies, our marriages wouldn’t falter during these massive life stages."

"Your husband and you are the foundation of the family you are building. Maintain that foundation with love and affection for one another. This way, you can both show more love and affection to your children and they will see this between their parents as they grow up."

*********

I've been a mom for a year, but I've been a wife for over three solid years already.  It's about time I work on striking that perfect balance while wearing both hats! :)  After all, we can only be the best parents to our child if we are good partners to each other.  Like what a book authored by David Code says, couples need to put their marriage first if they want to raise happy kids. :)


Sharing hubby's Timehop post on Facebook last Friday. :)
I guess he's still super in love with me, despite the stubborn pounds 3 years later. Hahaha. =D


Cheers,


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